• Warren Buffet, probably

    "As far as personal investments go, forget stocks and bonds - the real smart money is on this K Juliet robe. Frankly, if you're not already wrapped in one, you're missing out on some serious returns in comfort and sex appeal."

  • Ray Dalio, allegedly

    "Principles? Sure, I've written about them. But if there's one guiding philosophy I've missed, it's this: invest in a K Juliet robe. It's the kind of asset that balances relaxation and self-worth in a way that no portfolio ever could."

  • The Dalai Lama, likely

    "Truly, the K Juliet robe is a spiritual garment for those who seek harmony within and around them. Wearing this robe, one is reminded to walk the path of mindfulness, cultivating peace and inner balance."